Raising Strong Women: 10 Things your Daughter Needs from you

Motherhood. It’s a journey like no other. When I held each of my daughters for the first time, I felt an indescribable mix of emotions. Wonder, love, and a deep sense of purpose. And I think no one can truly understand motherhood until living through its ups and downs.

No matter how much we discuss equality, there are some things in which raising boys and girls is different, so, as I have a firsthand view on raising girls, this article is all about what I think we as moms can do to help them with their start into this world.

Since our childhood days, our world has changed drastically. 

So there are some things we need to take into account that weren’t an issue before and some things I grew up with are still valid. For those wondering about nurturing a strong, modern-day bond with their daughter, here are a few insights to consider:

1. Instilling Self-Worth: You’re More Than Enough

One of the most significant gifts we can offer our daughters is a sense of self-worth. Confidence, self-love, and the belief that they’re enough just as they are.

Many of us grew up in an environment clouded by self-doubt, constantly battling internalized beliefs that held us back. The last thing I’d want is for my daughters to curb their dreams, thinking they lack the essence to achieve them.

Often, society is quick to pinpoint flaws. Amidst this noise, the genuine qualities that make us shine often go unnoticed. Yet, we have the power to change this narrative.

Guide your daughter in recognizing her unique strengths. Let her embrace her individuality, reminding her to rise above the whispers and stand tall in her truth.

As girls navigate their formative years, they become increasingly aware of societal standards, especially concerning appearance. These years might have them questioning their skin tone or the shape of their features. Yet, the role of a mother can be pivotal here. Remind her that her worth is not bound to her physical appearance, but to her actions, dreams, and the love she extends.

What genuinely counts in life is the impact you make, the dreams you chase, and the joy you bring to those around you. No external standard should overshadow your inner brilliance.

2. A Mother’s Role as the Unshakable Pillar of Strength 

Every girl, evolving into a woman, navigates the tumultuous paths of adolescence, with its hormone surges, as well as transformative experiences like motherhood. Moreover, life may throw curveballs such as heartbreaks or intense transitions, which can stir profound emotional waves.

In these moments, a mother’s steady hand can be a guiding light. As a daughter grapples with the whirlwind of emotions and the intricacies of womanhood, reprimanding her could further cloud her perception.

Instead, embracing her with patience, warmth, and open arms can make a world of difference. Rather than focusing on missteps, empower her with the assurance that she’s never alone in this journey. Reinforce the idea that she’s got a lifelong confidant, ready to lend an ear anytime.

In fostering this bond, every mother must instill in her daughter the belief that, come what may, her mother’s support remains unwavering.

3. The Beauty of Truly Being There for Her

Balancing household responsibilities with cherishing moments with our children can feel like walking a tightrope. Yet, when it comes to our girls, their stories and insights often paint a vivid picture of their day. Their tales of school adventures and everyday challenges deserve our full attention.

In the hustle and bustle, it’s tempting to think there’ll be a perfect, uninterrupted moment to engage with them. Yet, life’s pace rarely slows down. So, seize those fleeting moments, even if they last merely a few minutes. Dive deep into their world, listening intently.

Resist the urge to delay their stories because of chores or tasks. If you genuinely need a moment, assure them that once your task wraps up, their words will take center stage. As they grow, every moment you miss can subtly widen the emotional bridge between you.

And when those monumental days in their lives arise, be there, cheering them on. Consider setting aside time for solo outings with each daughter if you’re blessed with multiple. These dedicated moments – their “spotlight” time with mom – will etch into their memories, crafting stories they’ll cherish for a lifetime.

4. Cultivate Her Belief System: Seeing the Star She Truly Is

The convictions we form in our early years are more than fleeting thoughts. They lay the foundation for our journey, guiding our choices and fueling our ambitions.

When she steps forward, eyes alight with dreams, hold back from casting your reservations onto her. Even the faintest hint of doubt from you can sway her confidence. Should you notice her holding back due to her self-imposed barriers, gently guide her perspective and help her see beyond them.

Shifting those self-limiting views is possible at any stage, but as her mom, you have the power to stop them before they take root.

While it’s easy to point out flaws, it’s time to shift the narrative. Praise her genuine qualities. A simple affirmation, like “The way you helped your sister showed maturity,” can amplify her sense of self-worth. Let her know you see her strengths, and she’ll start seeing them too.

Constantly remind her of her value. Words like „thank you for..“ or “I appreciate” can make a big difference in her world.

5. Embrace the Role of a Peaceful Parent

A parent’s emotional climate deeply impacts their child’s mental space. Studies indicate that frequent outbursts can lead kids down a path of anxiety, self-doubt, and even aggressive behavior.

When patience is thin and tempers flare easily, it builds walls. Your daughter might hesitate to share her missteps, fearing a fiery response. It’s essential to channel that calm, understanding energy.

I’m not saying that I never have those moments, but I want to be that go-to person for my daughters, someone they don’t shy away from during their challenging times. So they are worth it to work on myself. Besides, finding that inner calm is not just for them — it’s a gift to ourselves as well.

6. Encourage Her Independence and Self-Compassion

To truly empower her, it’s essential to step back and give her room to breathe. By giving her space, she learns, grows, and navigates the world on her terms.

So when she stumbles or makes a misstep, don’t be swift with criticism. Instead, remind her that everyone faces challenges and setbacks. It’s a part of life’s learning curve.

The vital lesson here? Teach her the art of self-forgiveness. No one should be haunted by past errors. Instead, instilling a sense of humor and perspective can help her bounce back from those “oops” moments. Life’s too short, and sometimes, the best thing to do is just laugh it off.

7. Empower Her With Knowledge About Her Body

One of the most critical lessons we can impart to our young girls is the understanding of personal boundaries. 

From an early age, girls need to recognise what feels right and what doesn’t. 

This conversation isn’t just about awareness; it’s about arming them with the means to protect themselves should they ever face danger. A mother-daughter talk on this topic isn’t just beneficial—it’s crucial.

Starting from their earliest years, we should engage in open discussions using terms they can understand. Reinforce the idea that her body is exclusively hers. She alone dictates the terms of her boundaries, and she must feel confident in asserting them.

Above all, ensure she knows she can always turn to you if she ever feels unsafe or if something happens. Your role isn’t just to educate, but to listen and support.

I’m also for empowering them to defend themselves physically because it changes their self-awareness and that will show, making them less likely to be a target for others.

8. Shaping Her Future: Instilling Values and Essential Life Skills

As a parent, we’re responsible not only for our children’s basic needs but also for equipping them with the values and skills they’ll carry into adulthood. This guidance can make all the difference in the world.

Core Values Every Daughter Should Embrace:

• Integrity: The cornerstone of trust and genuine relationships.
• Compassion & Empathy: Essential for understanding and connecting with others.
• Self-Love & Mutual Respect: Foundations for personal well-being and healthy relationships.
• Diligence: Every dream is achieved through perseverance.
• Gratitude: Recognizing the beauty in life’s gifts.
• Self-Assuredness: Empowering her to stand tall, no matter the circumstances.
• Self-Discipline: A key driver behind all success stories.
• Financial Acumen: Understanding the value of money and the essence of independence.
• Equality Awareness: For a world where everyone is seen and valued equally.
• Handling Criticism: Because not all feedback is positive, and that’s okay.

Life Skills She Can Lean On:

• Homemaking: Creating a space that feels like home.
• Culinary Skills: More than just cooking— it’s an expression of love.
• Growing Things: Whether it’s food or flowers, it lets us grow as well.
• Basic Tailoring: Because sometimes, a little stitch can save the day.
• Financial Savviness: Budgeting, saving, and spending wisely.
• Laundry Basics: From sorting colors to treating stains.
• Effective Communication: The bridge to understanding and being understood.
• Manners & Etiquette: Graceful interactions make lasting impressions.
• Basic Home Maintenance: Handy fixes everyone should know. (You can find several resources online!)
• First-Aid Know-How: Being prepared for minor mishaps.
• Elementary Car Repairs: Because she’s got places to be.
• Problem-Solving: Approaching challenges with a strategic mindset.

By ensuring she’s grounded in solid values and equipped with practical skills, we set her up for a life of purpose, independence, and resilience.

9. Guiding Her Through Emotional Tides

Every individual, regardless of gender, experiences emotional highs and lows. But for many young girls, these waves can be accentuated by hormonal changes, making emotions feel all the more intense and, at times, overwhelming.

Understanding her emotional journey and helping her navigate it can be a game-changer. The shifting sands of emotions like anger, frustration, and sudden mood variations can leave her puzzled. She might not even realize why she’s feeling a certain way.

Your little girl needs your help to build emotional intelligence. Whether she’s experiencing sadness, frustration, or irritation, simply voicing it can bring clarity. Statements like, “It sounds like you’re feeling pretty upset,” or “You seem frustrated,” can be validating. Your understanding and connection provide a safe space, encouraging her to share rather than bottle up her emotions.

In addition to being her pillar, arm her with tools she can use on her own. Equip her with coping techniques that can help her channel those emotions productively:

• Mindfulness and Meditation: Grounding exercises that bring her back to the moment.
• Deep Breathing: A quick way to calm the storm within.
• Pursuing Passion Projects: Immersing in activities that uplift her spirit.
• Nature Walks: Sometimes, a breath of fresh air can provide the clarity she needs.

By standing with her during her emotional ebbs and flows and equipping her with strategies, you’re not only supporting her present but also setting her up for a resilient future.

10. Navigating the Digital Jungle: Keeping Your Daughter Safe

In this rapidly digitizing world, it’s more essential than ever to guide our children through the nuances of online safety.

Horror tales of online threats and cyberbullying seem omnipresent. However, we can help them navigate the digital world.

Here are 7 Proactive Measures for Online Safety:

 1. Open Dialogues: Initiate candid conversations about the potential hazards lurking in the vast realm of the internet, including misleading content on social media.

 2. Awareness: Ensure they’re informed about notorious online challenges and games. Equip them with the discernment to sidestep these pitfalls.

 3. Time Management: Setting boundaries on screen time isn’t just about discipline—it’s about well-being.

 4. A Balanced Life: Reinforce the importance of harmony between online interactions and real-world experiences.

 5. Guarding Personal Information: Impress upon them the golden rule of the internet: Never share personal details with unfamiliar faces online. Equip them with the knowledge to block unwanted interactions.

 6. Online Guidance: Ensure they understand the importance of consulting with trusted adults before acting on any online directives.

7. Responsible Social Media Usage: Remind them that the glitzy lives showcased on social media platforms might not always reflect reality.

In Summary

The key to a good mother-daughter bond lies in open-hearted communication. I want them to always see me as their refuge. Whether they’re coming to me with whimsical tales or deep-seated fears, I want them to know they’re cherished and heard.

Perfection in motherhood is elusive. Yet, with every dawn, I strive to better myself for them. I’m curious, though—what lessons do you deem vital for your daughter? Share your thoughts below.